Tag Archives: 1983 Topps

WTF – 1983 Topps, Pittsburgh Pirates

13 Jul

1983 Topps - Don Robinson

1983 Topps - Ross Baumgarten

So… these cards came back to back in a pack of 1983 Topps I opened recently.  Tell me this wouldn’t freak you out.  It’s a complete mirror image of early 80’s Pittsburgh polyester glory.  I do wish they’d bring back those hats…

I’ll be honest with you though.  All that black and yellow made me want to dance.

Names I Can’t Believe Aren’t Famous – Biff Pocoroba

5 Apr

1983 Topps - Biff Pocoroba

This is a tough-sounding name.  I almost think he’s going to come up to me and say “what are you looking at, butthead?” Or, maybe he’ll fire a “why don’t you make like a tree and get outta here?”

And you never know, maybe George McFly will knock him out with one punch in the parking lot during the Enchantment Under the Sea dance.  Even better, he could drive into a manure truck again.

Those are Back to the Future references.  His name is Biff, like Biff Tannen.  Try to keep up.

Fantastic Fashions – the Chicago White Sox

23 Nov

If you didn’t watch baseball before 1991, when they switched to the classic black, white and silver that they wear today – one of the best uniforms in baseball – you wouldn’t be aware that for a long time, the Chicago White Sox had awful, horrible uniforms and were a gimmick-ridden club that never won anything.

At various times, they tried several combinations of black, blue and even bright red.  They had pinstriped uniforms, and then they removed the pinstripes, and then they brought the pinstripes back.  Their “sox” weren’t even white for the  longest time.  In 1976, they even tried wearing shorts.  Yes, shorts.  In baseball.  In the Major Leagues.  True story.  Some pretty good players play in the Major Leagues, they say it’s the best baseball in the world.

Basically, they were a colossal clusterfuck of baseball fashion.

Today, we are going to highlight their uniforms from the late 1970’s into the early 1980’s, and then the last design they wore throughout the majority of the 1980’s.

Highlights of the late 1970’s-early 1980’s, modeled for us here on 1982 Topps by pitcher Steve Trout:

1982 Topps - Steve Trout

-Vintage jerseys, before vintage was cool.  In fact, at this time, vintage was decidedly uncool.  Have you seen the multicoloured polyester crap MLB teams wore during that time, mostly in football stadiums with artificial turf?
-Untucked jersey.  That’s right.  Untucked.  Like pajamas.
-Big, fat, 1970’s collars.
-Don’t forget, they wore fucking shorts with these uniforms once.

Highlights of the rest of the 1980’s, modeled for us on 1983 Topps by outfielder Rudy Law:

1983 Topps - Rudy Law

-Big thick stripes on the sleeves.
-Big thick stripes housing the logo on the front.
-A number on the elastic-waist pants.
-General confusion with hockey jerseys.

Things are much better for the White Sox now, but they certainly stood out among the worst in a bad era of fashion for baseball.

Names I Can’t Believe Aren’t Famous – Champ Summers

28 Aug

1983 Topps - Champ Summers

This has got to be the ultimate baseball name.  I mean, can you think of a hockey player or football player being named “Champ Summers?”  No, it would have to be a ballplayer.

Champ wasn’t a regular player for most of his career, but in 1979 and 1980 he took advantage of some playing time with Detroit and put up a couple of decent seasons.

He is most famous for this absolutely fantastic brawl between the Padres and Braves, however.  The video is worth a look.

His Wikipedia profile indicates that he now runs a summer camp called “Champ Summers’ Summer Camp for Champs,” which earns Champ the award for best name usage in a personal project.  Ever.

Names I Can’t Believe Aren’t Famous – Mike Norris

9 Jul

1983 Topps - Mike Norris

Anyone this cool must be Chuck’s brother.  How does nobody know about this?

Mike actually won 22 games for the 1980 Oakland Athletics, and won the Gold Glove in both 1980 and 1981.  However, he was burned out and out of the majors by the end of the 1983 season.  Impressively, seven years later he made a comeback with the A’s and posted a 3.00 ERA in 27 innings.

Now you know.

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