Manly, Magical Mustaches – Danny Goodwin

1981 Donruss – Danny Goodwin

So, a few weeks ago, Major League Baseball held its 2013 First Year Player Draft.  During that draft, Mark Appel was selected first overall by the Awful Houston Astros.  This took place after Appel was selected eighth overall by the Pittsburgh Pirates (currently the best team in baseball) in the 2012 First Year Player Draft, but did not sign with the team by the signing deadline.

Back in 1971, a ballplayer named Danny Goodwin was drafted first overall by the Chicago White Sox, but did not sign, and instead attended Southern University and A & M.  Then, in 1975, he was drafted first overall by the California Angels, who had been the Los Angeles Angels, and later became the Anaheim Angels, and then the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, due to a few ridiculous people who thought all of this made sense.  This makes Danny Goodwin the only player to ever be selected first overall twice in the MLB draft.

Unfortunately, despite being drafted first overall twice, Danny Goodwin’s career only amounted to 252 games, which is still a lot more than you or I will ever play in the Major Leagues.  Fortunately, Danny Goodwin’s career left baseball, America, the world, and, in fact, the universe, with one of the all-time greatest mustaches in the history of mustaches.  Nobody can fault the White Sox or the Angels for taking such a mustache with a #1 overall pick.  In fact, one might salute them for their selections.

Badass Beards – Tony Scott

1981 Donruss – Tony Scott

Tony Scott was a fairly average utility outfielder who once stole 37 bases for the St. Louis Cardinals in 1979.  He also both began and ended his career with the Montreal Expos, playing only a combined 167 games for them.

More importantly, Tony Scott is going to use that baseball bat to hit you with.  Check out that look on his face.  Tony Scott knows exactly what is going to happen, but you don’t.

Consider yourself warned.

Haircuts I Wish I Could Pull Off – The Dave Rosello

1981 Donruss – Dave Rosello

This particular haircut could also be called “The Earmuffs,” as it really looks like Dave Rosello is wearing a rather magnificent pair of the winter earwear.  I mean, check these out.  See what I mean?

Rosello spent his career as a utility infielder in cold climates.  Chicago (Cubs, 1972-77) and Cleveland (1979-81) can be cold, cold places in April.  Maybe that explains his particular brand of hairstyle.  Also, who needs those new-fangled earflaps on a batting helmet when you’ve got your own protection?

It seems to me that Rosello was a man ahead of his time, and a man for all seasons.

Badass Beards – Al Hrabosky

1981 Donruss - Al Hrabosky

Look at this beard: thick, dark, and completely contradictory to the long, hot Atlanta summer.

Al Hrabosky, the “Mad Hungarian,” now does colour commentary for Cardinals games – well, some of them, anyway.  He has a website that I think was designed by someone who was reasonably good with the Internet in 1996.  It doesn’t tell you anything, but hey, it’s there.

He also at least lent his name to Al Hrabosky’s Ballpark Saloon, but the restaurant’s website doesn’t work anymore, so I’m not sure if it’s still there.  Anyone from St. Louis care to enlighten me?

If the Saloon is still there, you can leave that beard hair in my burger, thank you very much.  It might make me a bit tougher, and I don’t care how weird that sounds.