Haircuts I Wish I Could Pull Off – The Czechoslomullet

17 Aug

Although remnants of it can still be found today, the Czechoslomullet had its heyday in the early 1990’s.  Popular among hockey players from the Czech Republic and Slovakia, it is noticeable by the following three characteristics:

  1. Extra-long flow in the back.  Beyond the level of what was expected from your average hockey haircut.
  2. Often found hiding under one of several models of horrible Jofa buckets.
  3. Usually attached to flashy, offensive-minded players.

1992-93 Upper Deck - Jaromir Jagr (SIDENOTE: How cool were these multiple image cards back then? This should be its own category. Who runs this fucking blog?)

1992-93 Score Dream Team - Jaromir Jagr

Jaromir Jagr (above) is often credited with making the Czechoslomullet famous, and was basically the poster boy throughout his career.  Jagr definitely clung to it long after he should have let go and moved on, but when you get 1599 career NHL points, you can do whatever you want.

1990-91 Pro Set - Petr Klima

Petr Klima wore it well in the early 1990’s for the Edmonton Oilers.  Klima allegedly once said, “I’m not here to work hard, I’m here to score goals.”  Some might say this taints the Czechoslomullet, but I disagree.  I would suggest this type of cocky behaviour only adds to the mystique.  Plus, his Jofa was arguably the worst of all the Jofas.

1991-92 O-Pee-Chee - Petr Svoboda

Petr Svoboda, an elder statesman of this ‘do, was a rare exception by sporting a North American style CCM lid.  However, substantial doubt remains as to whether he wore shoulder pads, as well as just what the hell happened to the second “e” in his name.  Get over yourself, Petr.

1992-93 Upper Deck - Michal Cerny

Although Michal Cerny never played a game in the NHL, he combined long flow and bad helmet at the 1993 IIHF World Junior Championship as well as anyone else in history, and he deserves to be commended for that.  Michal, you have done your homeland and the game of hockey proud.  For that, we thank you.

There you have it, the Czechoslomullet.  I call for a reunion tour.  Anyone?

One Response to “Haircuts I Wish I Could Pull Off – The Czechoslomullet”

  1. the spoke easy. August 17, 2010 at 12:49 PM #

    I have that Jagr multiple image card. it’s still in a glass cardholder. I remain convinced that one day it will be worth a lot.

    Also, I knew a Piotr Klimas. rather than petr klima.

    I called him pee-odour, because i am hilarious.

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